Road to Recovery



For anyone new to sobriety:
There is so much in store for you
 
Sarah 
Celebrating 15 years of Sobriety

I started using from a very young age (11). The first substance I ever used was opium. I will never forget the fear I felt when I first picked up. But of course, that fear was not enough to stop me from using for the next 10 years. Shortly after that, I picked up alcohol, then cigarettes, then weed, then opioids, then coke, and so on. Using consumed my entire teen existence. I look back at those years and can’t recall one sober day. If I’m being honest, I can't recall the majority of that time in my life.

 

During my time using, I learned how to lie, cheat, and steal–no one and nothing was off limits during that time. I used my friends, my family, employers and even my drug dealers, until they could not stomach me anymore. At the end of my using, I was cut off from everyone. I was living out of my car.  I had no job, no one to turn to, no hope and completely void of any relationship with God.

 

I don’t exactly recall how my mom wound up finding and bringing me home, but I do remember the rules she had for my return. I needed to get sober and maintain that sobriety. I would have random breathalyzers and drug tests, and I had to attend two AA meetings a day. Of course, I had no intentions of following any of this, but I really needed some sleep, a shower, and a change of clothes. I did not wind up leaving, instead I withdrew in my bedroom for a week.  That was the sickest I’ve ever been.  I went to my first AA meeting on the 8th day.  I remember walking in, sitting down, and sobbing uncontrollably.  At the age of 19, I was just so sick and worn out by life.  After the meeting, a group of women came over to me –they just sat with me and let me cry for another hour.  As I remember this, I cry because at that time I had not experienced that amount of kindness and understanding in a very long time.

 

Upon leaving that meeting, I felt another feeling I had not felt in a long time, if ever maybe.  I felt hope.  I know for a fact that God did for me what I never could have done for myself.  By God's grace, my obsession to use was lifted.  This is not to say that after everything was fine.  Those first few years of sobriety are hard; we have to learn ourselves all over again without our crutches.

 

God has carried me through each and every moment of my life.  In these last 15 years, I have had some of the happiest times and some of the saddest times.  Through it all, I can truly say I get to live a life beyond my wildest dreams.  Not because I have everything I want, but because I am full of Peace and God's Grace.  I have a loving husband, an incredible 5 year old, and I have my own business.  My home is safe and I am COVERED in the blood of Jesus.

 

For anyone new to sobriety: There is so much in store for you. God's promises and the promises of the program will come true in your life.  Keep putting one foot in front of the other and doing the next right thing.  It’s been an honor to share a small part of my story with you and I pray that I am able to continue doing so for a lifetime.

 

Sarah

Celebrating 15 Years of Sobriety

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